Newest blog ever!

So hello there. This is Alex Joyce and this is my blog. If you were expecting someone else then I guess that's fair enough. There's a lot of people in the world and it would be pretty selfish for me to assume you thought this was mine.

Well anyways...

I've discovered (through the wisdom of an outside perspective, i.e. mein daddy-o), that I am one judgmental little bastard. I realised after talking with him, that within five minutes of meeting someone, I already have them in a little box, have categorised and labeled them and stuck them in my little (actually cavernous) warehouse of cerrebelumland (The warehouse is cavernous, not my mind). This is highly ludicrous. It annoyed me a bunch when I realised it, because at the same time as I was disgusted with myself, I found I love compartmentalising and discarding people. Which is ludicrously ludicrous. I don't know why I do it, I think it's some sort of elitism, like it gives me a feeling like I have worth because I've discarded someone.

URGH

I'm attempting to hit the brakes on the courtroom in my mind-warehouse, or at least fire the judge. He's a jerk but I keep on hanging out with him. It's pretty hard since it's the first time I've realised I'm like this, possibly (in other words definitely) because obviously it is painfully hard to be introspective with lucidity. Outside perspectives are always healthy but I'm so stubborn I rarely look for them.

-Anyways-

I like ping pong. I'm slowly getting worse at it. Who knows why. Lately I've gotten sillier. I think it's because I've made friends (acquaintences?) with the DTS now and talking to people gets me all hyper. Whoo knowspth. I like ice cream but not too much of it. I wish we could have a dog here. Sometimes I get the insane uge to iron my face even though it would hurt a bunch. I hate reading the dictionary. I haven't read for awhile so last night I read a bunch. It was satisfying. I didn't read the dictionary. German is going well. I wish it was going faster though. I'm just listening to podcasts and the guy has a silly voice. I think it's pretty annoying that I'm the only person in my family that didn't get nice straight hair. I think I should go get that last piece of pizza but I'm at that weird half-full state where you don't really want to eat but you actually sort of do. My last girlfriend and I broke up two years ago, she's had other relationships but I haven't been interested, I keep wondering which one of us got over each other. Maybe we both did. I haven't even thought about her in forever but I can still remember her birthday. My chin grows red and blond hairs but my head is dark brown. I hate chess. I love chicken but not too often. The internet really annoys me but I can't seem to get off of it. If I wash my face too often I get dark circles under my eyes. I really want some boots but I keep worrying which ones look more metal when I really just want something that doesn't get my feet wet. My back hurts. I should stop cracking it. I love hot peppers. I love dr. pepper but if my real doctor was named that he would probably freak me out.

I just had to get that out.

Peace.

We Will Rise

This is probably my favourite metal song of all time, I just wanted to share the lyrics witchoo all. They inspire me a bunch. The song is by Arch Enemy and called We will rise (of course).

Tear down the walls
Wake up the world
Ignorance is not... Bliss
So fed up with the Second best
Our time, Is here and now

I am the enemy
I am the antidote
Watch me closely
I Will Stand up... NOW!

We Will Rise
Above (x2)

Stereotype fools
Playing the game
Nothing Unique
They all look the same
In this Sea of Mediocrity
I can be anything
Anything I want to be

I am the enemy
I am the antidote
Watch me closely
I will stand up... NOW!

We Will Rise
Above

We Will Rise

We Will Rise

I am the Enemy
(I am the Enemy)
I am the Antidote
(I am the Antidote)

We Will Rise
Above
We Will Rise
We Will Rise
Rise Above

WE WILL RISE

Here the song if you are so inclined to listen to amazing (and heavy) music.

So... what the heck

Here it comes again... I have these moody spells coming on more often lately.
I think things are just coming to a head what with turning 18 and everything. Turning 17 seemed big but 18 seems massive.

I don't know what to do with my life.

I wish I could shake this feeling of being a jerk all the time.

I'm too quiet... It seems like people want more out of me but I never can think of anything to say.

What's the point of life?? I know what you would say for what's the MEANING of life, but what the heck is the point? I mean, I like being alive and everything, but it seems like the things that people fill their lives with are so ridiculously petty and stupid. A full schedule does not mean you have a full life.

I feel like I should apologise for my last post. Even though it was lighthearted and I know I wasn't really mocking the people described in it, I just met them and haven't really even given them a fair chance yet... so in about a month I can make fun of them but right now it seems more like I'm serious (and judgemental)

My sense of humour is pretty brutal though, I think stereotypes, really serious horrible situations and racial jokes are the funniest things in the world. It's not like I actually mean any of those things when I'm laughing at them, in fact I don't know why I think they're funny. I think it's a sort of deranged, maniacal laughter. Like my mum has been talking about some people we know who pretty much base their lives on finances, and who have recently been losing a lot of money because of you-know-what, and I just couldn't hold in laughing. I thought it was absolutely hilarious that they were losing tons of money. That's a pretty dark sense of humour.

I think that right now I just have an obsessive paranoia of putting value on valueless things.

Colour of skin, pride in where you come from (which isn't necessarily a bad thing, it's just a bad thing to not be able to take a joke), and banks, governments, taxes and the American dream are all basically really meaningless things. So I just have a really hard time not laughing when people put such ridiculous amounts of faith in faulty ground.

Ugh... what does matter, though... (rhetorical question)

I seem to put all of my faith in music.

It's not like people are going to stop making it at least.

It's not exactly an unshakable tower though

I heard somewhere that physicists found that the smallest matter in creation was sound

that's probably BS

but it's cool to think that my favourite thing in the world is what the world was made out of all along

again, probably a load o' crap

punctuation is overrated

no wait

No it's not.

I like it when people speak and write good English.

Ugh, what am I talking about?? Lazy speech really annoys me, of course I love good English!

So now I'm pretty much just typing whatever comes to mind

Sometimes I'll be staring and my mum will ask me, "What are you thinking about?", and I'll usually say "Nothing"... but I'm always thinking about something

I think so much I don't even know what I believe.

That's why I like to single stuff out and get to the roots of it

This post is probably so long now that half of you will take a look at how long it is and go back to facebook

The other half of you got this far and are currently reading this sentence.

Oh yeah, and sorry that you need a google account to comment.

I would still really love for you to say something to me on facebook though.

OK peace

Hello

This is my first blog in an actual blog.

How bizarro.

I think less people will read it because it's not just sitting on facebook, but whatever.

The dedicated shall arise from the ashes, and set forth into motion their will to read!

and the unbelievers shall be struck down...

WEEEEELLL anyways back to life at the lodge.

My fingers hurt because I've started popping my knuckles again... it's pretty ludicrous to have arthritis at 18.That's pretty discouraging.

So I have finally established some sort of comfortableness with the DTS. I have spoken to them and they have spoken to me. Of course I've already talked to the more outgoings ones, it's just the ones who are always in little huddles that it's harder to break into conversation with.

Do you remember a post I had awhile ago about Narnia and sitting at the back of the property and watching the sunsets? Well a long time before that I had saved a helpless chair from the destructive tendencies of several nameless (Hermoine and Ilham) grounds workers while it was sitting waiting in a long line of brush and beautiful old hand-carved wardrobes (which apparently are old, ugly and gaudy and are being replaced by particle-board ikea ones at a rate of knots) to be incinerated in the fire behind the Ed. block. I set the poor chair out on the old watertower foundation, and voíla! My secret leetle Narnia-place was made a lot more comfortable. Many a book have I read in that chair.

Liam and I recently started making jokes about some people he met on a trip one time, saying things like: "Um, so like... like, lip gloss?" and we thought this was pretty funny so we expanded it from the other people to Washington people, who we dubbed the "fairtrade people" (I can do this because I am from Washington). These people definitely take a lot of pictures of lawn chairs that they turn black and white. These people's conversations would take on a more practical and do-you-know-what-I-mean sort of voice and they would say such things as "So, you know, like, I think that, like, the fact that it has, like, an African on the cover of this tea means it's like, you know, more tolerant and stuff?".

So the point of this was, very soon after the people arrived, we started noticing that there were a lot of pictures circulating of none other than....

My chair at the back of the property.

and many of them had been turned black and white.

Liam and I thought this was probably the funniest thing since sliced bread.

Now we're not insulting their intelligence, and we like them all a bunch and would hate to offend them. Basically I thought this was all just a funny exchange and wanted to share witchoo all.

Peace to you all